How to judge your communication skills

Discussion in 'Self Improvement and Being Successful' started by abohadi, Mar 12, 2009.

  1. abohadi

    abohadi
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    There are two ways to judge your communication skills: To be judged by other people or by monitoring yourself.

    It can be little embarrassing to ask your peers or colleagues about how you are when you communicate with them but surely you will find true friends who will tell you useful information about your way of communication. In fact, understanding how you are perceived through your close friends is the first step to improve yourself.

    If that’s not an option, you can try the second way to evaluate your communication skills. Use video camera to record yourself talking about any subject that you have knowledge in.

    You will be so amazed when monitoring yourself that you may wonder “Is that I am who talking! Is that how I am when talking!
    Take down some notes about your flaws, tone of your voice, content you speak about, your facial expressions, your gestures … so that you can use them to improve yourself in front of others.

    There is another and most effective way to improve your communication skills: It is learning from the ones who are judged as successful communicators. You can see them easily on TV or meet them in any kind of gathering. Study them, their common words, their clear pronunciation, their right use of gestures and their confidence and try to implement that to yourself.

    At last you should know that when a person has a strong desire to improve himself and turns this desire into action, he will surely achieve what he wants.
     
  2. Fergal

    Fergal
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    A suggestion that I'd add is to ask yourself are you getting the results you want from your communication? If you're not try a different approach and see if that works better or not.

    For example, if you have been making suggestions to your boss and your boss is not taking them on board, you could ask yourself how could you communicate those suggestions in a different way. Then see if your boss is more responsive to your new approach. If not, try something else again, until you find what works.
     
  3. Nazreen

    Nazreen
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    I'd have to agree with you Abohadi that in judging how good your communication skills are, you can either ask others or you can judge yourself. But I think that asking others would be a better option since people normally tend not to be too critical of themselves. They might not even want to admit their faults and weaknesses.

    Fergal has also raised a very important point by judging according to the results. Are you getting your message across and how effectively are you able to do this?
     
  4. Kay

    Kay
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    Very true and there's also the other end of the spectrum where someone thinks they're doing terribly whereas if asked others would say they do just fine.

    The first time I made a business presentation I was ill before with nerves, felt awful all through and yet was told afterwards they'd never had guessed I hadn't done it for years because I came across as self-assured. The only assured thing was that my stomach did flip flops throughout. :rolleyes: It's almost impossible to judge yourself.
     
  5. Fergal

    Fergal
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    It's normal to be nervous when doing a presentation. This nervousness keeps us sharp and can actually help us make a better presentation. I wouldn't worry about being nervous, it is normal and even very experienced presenters often quake in their boots before delivering a presentation.
     
  6. crazy_awper

    crazy_awper
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    I agree with you,I think you are right,good luck to you guy!
     
  7. ShawnLim

    ShawnLim
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    Hmm, business presentation? Never tried before.
    But I've done quite a lot of school work presentation, ;)

    Often, it is the feeling of fear that will pulls you down.
    It is not the fear that actually causes you to be nervous, it is the
    feeling of fear itself.

    So, the best way to overcome this is to overcome the thinking
    of fear in your mind. If you can control you mind, you are able
    to get rid of the fear.
     
  8. Fergal

    Fergal
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    Have you any suggestions as to how to do this?
     
  9. ShawnLim

    ShawnLim
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    Well Fergal, this is a huge topic. A whole book has been written on
    how to get rid of fear.

    However, here's a technique on how you can get rid of fear.
    Very simple and very easy to implement.

    Say, if you're doing something that you fear to do, the technique is...
    JUST DO IT.

    Let's say if you're fear of presentation. To get rid of it, just go
    on the stage and present. Action is the best and the simplest
    solution for fear.

    You can develop habit by repetition. The more you do the more
    you're able to master it. Like what people always say...
    "Practice makes perfect"

    Hope this helps. :)
     
  10. MH Vishal

    MH Vishal
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    You don't sound all that course to me. Maybe cut yourself some slack, take a step back and re-evaluate life. Find a compass that points you in the direction that you want to go, and not the way others expect you to. We all have our rough spots that we need to work on. It sounds like you may be ahead of most. Good luck.
     
  11. Fergal

    Fergal
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    Thanks Shawn, I somehow missed your post until now, I agree with you, the best way to deal with fear is to face it head on and do exactly the thing you are afraid of.

    I've seen people, who have let one fear beat them and change their behaviour for the worse, suddenly develop another strong fear. So it is very important to face your fears and learn how to conquer them. No one wants to live their life in fear.
     
  12. ted bailey

    ted bailey
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    I think this is an important suggestion. Many people are afraid to look at there own results to see if it is getting them anywhere. Start with a baseline and start changing one thing at a time and see what changes occur against that baseline.
     

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