NO emotion is justifiable in business

[Frankers]

I want to share a lesson I learned. The other day, I was making calls for my merchant account business and I finally set an appointment for two days later. One thing I asked her to do was to bring her merchant statement so we could look at it together. I went out of my way, which i dont want to share the details about, to get to her place of business and she didn't have the merchant account statement that I asked her to bring.

At that point I was thinking it was no big deal, things happen, and I attempted to reschedule with her for another date. here's when I started to take it a little personally. She seemed to blow me off by saying that she did'nt know when she could reschedule and that I should follow up with her a week later. Do you know that feeling you get when you think someone is just blowing smoke up your butt, it is so disappointing.

Well, i decided I was just going to take her word for it and I followed up on the exact day she said to do so. When I did, she said yet again that I should follow up with her in another week. Now I was a little enraged. I was thinking, "so you're telling me that i drove all the way to your place , you told me to follow up with you in a week, and now you're telling me the same thing again?". So I said " are you serious about meeting up or am i just waisting my time?. From that point, I could completely tell that she sort of turned off and didn't want to even consider the possibility of doing business with me.

I don't think it was so much what I said to her but how I said it. Studies show 90% of communication is done through body language. And I think my tone came across like I thought she was completely lying to me. Of course, it isn't a great feeling for someone to assume you are lying even if you really are.

My point is that my emotional reaction completely turned her off to the likelihood that she would ever do business with me. Now, I don't know if was really blowing me off or not, but my tone and my emotion weren't justifiably expressed. I should have just kept my composure and I would still possibly have had a customer.

The thing I learned was that I shouldn't just assume the worst in any situation and that even if the worst case scenario is true it still isn't ok for me to show my anger. Don't get me wrong, it's ok to feel the emotion but not ok to lose my composure over it for a few reasons.

First, she may have been acting flakey because she was going through some trauma in her life, you never know. Maybe she was so busy and she completely forgot about bringing her merchant statement. By assuming the worst I hurt her and our future relationship especially because no one likes for anyone to assume they have low character in a situation.

Second, in business, people respect you more when you don't react and are persistent instead. Non reaction and persistence together are key. It's the same thing when asking a girl out on a date. She may be playing hard to get the first few times you ask her, but if you completely keep your cool and remain consistent, may times, you will win in the end. So I learned not too assume the worst and not giving up.

Third, having an emotional reaction is like giving your power away by waisting energy. I do make a distinction between having the emotion and reacting to it. Reacting may inlude saying something you regret or even coming across angry to the other party involved. Instead of doing that, why not channel your emotion into something more positive like finding more clients?

Anyways, I hope you learned as much as I did in this situation. Remember, use the combination of non-reaction and persistence, it works like a charm in business. I do feel proud of myself for learning from the situation instead of just overlooking it and I hope you do too.

Go check out this article in my blog http://businessvisionary.wordpress.com

[Ben Advice]

While I see where you are coming from, I would have to say that there needs to be a little bit of emotion involved in business. The world of business does teach us to be robots, but this is not always possible nor is it healthy.

That said, there are some people in which you simply can't work with or build relationships with, but if you eliminate the negative emotions, you will also lose some emphasis on the positive ones. That doesn't mean be overly emotional, but it's important to let people know how you are feeling.

This is of course while keeping in mind the cardinal rule of business: be professional.

[Frankers]

While I see where you are coming from, I would have to say that there needs to be a little bit of emotion involved in business. The world of business does teach us to be robots, but this is not always possible nor is it healthy.

That said, there are some people in which you simply can't work with or build relationships with, but if you eliminate the negative emotions, you will also lose some emphasis on the positive ones. That doesn't mean be overly emotional, but it's
important to let people know how you are feeling.

This is of course while keeping in mind the cardinal rule of business: be professional.

My point is that you cn feel the negative emotion but what determines whether you are going to keep the relationship is how you react to it and how you come across. I mean we have all had those customers who thanked us for being patient while they were being difficult and they sometimes admit that. And we could have reacted negatively because yhat person was being rude and, thus, potentially would lose the sale. The customer ends up respecting us so much more because we kept our cool and wants to continue doing business with us.

[JClark@CitadelBC]

Simple logic:
Emotion can be positive or negative.
Positive emotion is required for successful business.
Business without emotion is can not successful.

[Frankers]

Simple logic:
Emotion can be positive or negative.
Positive emotion is required for successful business.
Business without emotion is can not successful.

Jclark I can't agree with you more. Maybe I should have named this article, there is no justification for a negative reaction with a customer.

[JClark@CitadelBC]

There you go.